Wanting Less

In minds crammed with thoughts, organs clogged with toxins, and bodies stiffened with neglect, there is just no space for anything else. - Alison Rose Levy I haven't had much room to breathe over the last several weeks; and, in many ways, I only have myself to blame.  I'm just terrible at taking care of myself.  Spoiler alert readers: I'm about to get real . If you don't know me well, you are about to; and, this absolutely terrifies me. I'm not sure how it all began.  For as long as I can remember, I haven't been able to relax, truly relax, my mind, body, or spirit.  My muscles are tight and sore much of the time. My shoulders sit just below my ears as if I'm a tiger ready to pounce.  Getting a massage makes me feel guilty because I worry about how hard the therapist would need to work to get through the stiff clenched sinew of my shoulders, back and legs.  My brain works overtime thinking of every possible scenario regardless of how important it may...

When I was a little girl, we traveled a lot.  We'd take my dad's 1980 Chevy Chevette all over the Northwest United States.  In those days, seat belt laws were lax and my folks would put my sleeping bag and a pillow on top of our luggage in the hatchback.  I'd lay there and look up at the stars repeating the same rhyme over and over: Starlight, star bright,  First star I see tonight,  I wish I may,  I wish I might,  Have the wish I wish tonight... Inevitably, I would wish to be a princess with fancy gowns and a beautiful palace.  I'd smile and curtsy knowingly to my adoring subjects.  "Oh, thank you," I'd say as they lavished compliments about my attire or plush decor...  My wishes and dreams evolved over the years, as maturity allowed. A university education was beyond my grasp; but, I worked hard and had the opportunity to move up in my career at a time when experience was valued as much as education.  Life, of course, had ...